Hotwife or Cuckold
I came across an interesting blog post/question over at one of my favorite blogs, I Love Cuckoldry where the blogger asks if hot wifing and cuckoldry are the same thing. His conclusion, and God forbid, I am not much good at figuring out conclusions, seems to be that regardless of the reality, society views the husbands of hotwives as cuckolds even though there are differences between the two. I have to agree, because mainstream folks, or at least those who won't admit an interest in the lifestyle, would think that a wife who fucks around with others is cuckolding her husband. 
Perhaps....but on the other hand, you can be a hotwife, and not exactly be cuckolding your husband, particularly if you, like many others like to have your husband join in the fun. When Melissa and I first started out, I was always an active participant, and our fun times revolved around MFM threesomes more than anything, although we had some MFMF times too with other couples. It has only been of late that this watching my wife thing has turned into something of a cuckold relationship, and that is as much because of me as her. I have discovered that I enjoyed those moments watching her with others, and kind of fell into the cuck role when I discovered that I got turned on when she treated me in a manner that a cuckold should be treated, denied access, told how small I am compared to some guy and so on.
The funny thing about this is, we seem to move back and forth between the two, hotwife/swinger and cuckold/cuckoldress, depending on our moods and the situation. In many situations, for whatever reason, I don't have a lot of interest in the wife of another couple we are playing with, preferring to be involved in whatever Melissa is doing. So playing with couples seldom holds much interest for me. Sure, occasionally a woman comes along that I want, but to be honest, no woman can replace my wife, and very few can keep me entertained while Melissa is getting her groove filled by the other's husband. I wanna watch....and sometimes be part of it. That's how it came to be that we got ourselves on Adult FriendFinder and started hooking up with single men. There was no other woman for me to contend with, and frankly, that's what a lot of it felt like. So, we gravitated to the hotwife with husband watching/participating and now we have moved into another level, that of cuckolding. Quite frankly, I've enjoyed it all.....and continue to do so....In fact, believe it or not, the most difficult part is finding the right guy to bring to the party. There are lots of eager applicants, but they don't all understand or know what it takes to be a "bull" in a relationship like ours. That's why I am always recommending this ebook about Becoming An Alpha Male because Melissa and I, and couples like us, need guys who know how to be the bull, and how to take part in a cuckold-hotwife-MFM relationship.
What about you? Do you think there is a difference? Is your wife a hotwife or are you a cuckold?
7 comments:
Definitely a difference and whether you realize it or not you did a good job of explaining what I also believe is the difference.
One is more so about participating as a couple and finding something that works for all 4 or 3 people. While cuckholding is more about dominance and submission (the husband's) and his realization that his wife is pleased by other men. But, it's like anything else, opinions on this are like assholes, everyone's got one =)
I think if the husband is sub that a bull is the best fit. I'm sub, initially protested my wife wanting to have sex with other men, but when we worked through it to the point of my meeting her friend, it really helped that he was an Alpha male. Like other comments have said, everyone is different, but it really helps the dynamic for me to be in my most sub role for his visits and when we visit him.
I think you did an excellent job at explaining the difference. I agree - hotwifing does include husband participation, perhaps joining in or finishing when the other male is done. From what I have read on teh cuckold experience - it is exactly that - denying the partner and the wife and her bull are in charge as to when or if you receive any satisfaction. I have also read the different levels of extreme on the topic. My husband went through a period where he wanted me to deny him as I continued to play with my bull - however it never went to the point where the bull was in charge in any way. I find it interesting there are so many interested in exploring both the hotwife and cuckold lifestyle, however both parties need to communicate well and discuss everything up front before proceeding down this road.
Hi I have a hot wife but am not a cuckold. In fact my gorgeous wife is out being fucked in a hotel as I write this. I prepared her including inserting love balls into her pussy before she left. She will be homwe at about 11 pm and then I will take out the balls and let his cum run out. They send me texts every now and again, the last one about 90 mins ago said they were going to the room. I can't wait to hear more!
I'm just starting out, and trying to figure this out myself! I'll be tracking your blog!
I am actually neither as of yet, but we intend on finding a man who can be a Bull. I think that both hotwives and cuckoldresses are in fact cuckolding their husbands, just by the raw definition of the word. But it seems that the word cuckold has taken on a different meaning.
My biggest fantasy is to be a true cuckold, but I would still be on cloud 9 if I was just living the hotwife lifestyle with my wife.
I think that a Hotwife couple fits us best. She plays and I get hear about it later or occasionally get to watch or participate in a MFM. There is no humiliation involved and often, I am told that my cock is larger than most of her fuckbuddies. But I have nothing against the cuckold arrangements, it just doesn't quite fit us as well.
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